Today’s post is brought to you by the fact that I just really don’t want to do my English final. So instead, a story about my bathroom spider.

About 80 years ago our downstairs bathroom was a little pantry thing. It was just a tiny dent in the wall with a door over it that the cook would put canned goods in. Then, years later, for absurd reasons unknown, someone decided to pull out the shelves and put a toilet and a sink in there. I’m thinking that this happened during the depression when the Virtue family that lived here was starving. They didn’t have food, so why have a pantry? They were all skinny and starving, so it wasn’t much trouble to fit themselves into the tiny bathroom. Fast forward a few centuries, the people living in this house no longer weigh 90 lbs or less… it is now the trouble bathroom.

To get inside this bathroom is something of an obstacle. You open the door first, then turn to the side and shuffle a few steps. Once your hip hits the sink, ( it almost touches the door when closed) you have to bend your knees and shuffle. If you’ve managed to suck in and do the shuffle correctly you should find yourself on the toilet with your legs pinned neatly under the sink.

So that’s the 2x3 foot pantry/bathroom I’m sure you all wanted to hear about, now for my spider. A few months ago, I spotted a tiny spider hiding the wallpaper pattern of the bathroom. He was white with almost invisible clear legs and was just a little jumpy. I would have squished him right then and there but… well that’s just icky. I figured he’d move on to another part of the house and I’d forget about him. But no. In addition to being jumpy he was also quite voyeuristic. Every time I found myself in that tiny bathroom he was there… watching. I nick named him Tom Harrington (“Peeping Tom” … original eh?), greeted him with a little puff of air. He’d jump and I would know he was alive.

But, a few weeks ago I noticed he was missing. I don’t know if he just got sick of me puffing air at him and disrupting his web, or maybe he needed a change of scenery. A new wallpaper, a new bathroom. I may never know. (Cue dramatic soap opera-ish music. Fade to black, new scene.)

Eck, maybe he was murdered. I never considered that. Well, the point is, I am now lacking a bathroom spider. I’ll be interviewing applicants from the back corner of the basement tomorrow, but I don’t think it will be the same. No one will ever be able to replace Tom Harrington.


Military code name generator:
http://www.ubique.ch/codename/

The Generator figured this would be a good codename for my naval battle in Russia:
Rolling Flash

Watch out Russia. Operation Rolling Flash is coming your way!


Okay, now I really need to do my English final.

I have kryptonite sitting on my bed.

The other day, as I finished off my second piece of chocolate cheesecake for breakfast, I figured I should probably start eating real food, possibly even healthy food. So I did. Sounds smart, right? Somehow it’s not ‘cause as soon as I started eating “good” food, I got sick. Blah. I need some cookies and a jar of olives, maybe then my allergies will go away.


When I was a kid I used to go on bike rides a lot with my family. Mostly we just rode up behind the doctors office, or HPM to the railroad tracks. Then we’d walk the tracks, play baseball with sticks, and sit down and look through all the rocks and junk. I don’t know what’s special about the tracks, but the stuff there was awesome. All kinds of fossils and crystals and bugs and rusted iron train parts and terracotta bits from an old pottery shop that exploded years ago. With our pockets and bike baskets full we’d ride home and clean up the things we’d found and come up with all kinds of wonderful explanations for what each thing was.

“These are bullets from a train robbery back a thousand years ago.”
“This is a fossil of dinosaur poop.”

We don’t go up there much anymore, but my dad still brings home fossils he finds at work. Yesterday he brought home this weird blue… thing. I put up some pictures here.

If you know what it is, tell me, because I can’t figure it out.

I like it, sweet and simple, but without the "sweet".

How Would YOU Take Over the World?

And my drained icon rocks. I’ll have to be drained more often so I can feel better by watching it’s face melt.

Check out my porno!

I'm so proud...



(Edit: I spelled "good" wrong the first time, but it's fixed now. Yes, yes, super blonde moment.)

It's too big to be used as a LJ icon, but I had to post it anyway.

I've hooked another one! My friend from school, Geoff, is now a Firefly fan. He's seen the first three episodes and is hungry for more. Now that sounds good and all, but he doesn't like Kaylee. What the hell is up with that you might ask... well, I don't know. He must be sick or crazy or dirty or sick and crazy and dirty. Not sure.

And my mum just sent this to me. It's nothing we don't already know.

Blah, now I have to go to school in the rain.

I’m a tit? Why am I a tit?


Which Spike are you?
Snatched from our very own Pop.

My dad just got home and he brought me chocolate covered raisins. I heart chocolate covered raisins so much. I even did the dance, “ungh” thrust and all.

Also, all you Browncoats out there know the news. Green light for FF movie. Hallelujah! That made my morning.