Go here. Buy some dolls.
http://www.freetobea.com/gallery.htm
Or some Christms Ornaments.
Leave a comment here about the site if you'd like. Artist welcomes thoughts. And welcomes requests to buy.
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Thursday, November 17, 2005
I’m still hibernating. Don’t worry. Still working on sleeping for a few more months. This is just a pee break, but winter will be over soon and I’m sure I’ll get back to posting. While we wait, you should all know that I’ve adopted my own hero theme music-- “Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained” by Hung sheng Yi (I think?). It plays loudly and makes small cups and picture fames shake when I’m around. If anyone out there is thinking, “oh, I heard that first in Kung Fu Hustle” then shut up, I’m my song, not theirs.
I’m also drinking green tea.
And having chocolate milk shakes for lunch.
Mag, your turn.
I’m also drinking green tea.
And having chocolate milk shakes for lunch.
Mag, your turn.
Friday, September 9, 2005
Hello my fans!
As some of you know I'm in Singapore at the moment. Not a lot of internet available, but at the moment I'm at the Singapore Science Center and for some odd reason, in addition to all the nifties, they've got computers set up with high speed internet connections. So hello from Singapore!
As some of you know I'm in Singapore at the moment. Not a lot of internet available, but at the moment I'm at the Singapore Science Center and for some odd reason, in addition to all the nifties, they've got computers set up with high speed internet connections. So hello from Singapore!
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Friday, August 5, 2005
Okay, so I went to the doctor's today for my usual once-in-a-blue-moon checkup. Somehow, without any real complaints I walked away with three prescriptions and both arms numb from shots. How? Before I walked into the doctors office I was fine. All my bits were in working order and nothing was turning unusual colors-- now both of my arms are basically immobile from the shoulder to the wrist, swollen, red and burning, and I'm in the middle of a god awful fever. At first all I could do was sleep in a cold sweat, and now, now I can't sleep. All I do is shake and burn. I think I have West Nile, Tetanus, Hepatitis A, B, C, D, and E and Malaria. If I survive the night it'll be a miracle.
Saturday, July 30, 2005
Muhahah! Plastic Fruit Photography!
http://www.throwyourownhead.com/photos/main.htm
A slight side-step away from my long... long... long ass work.
http://www.throwyourownhead.com/photos/main.htm
A slight side-step away from my long... long... long ass work.
Sunday, July 24, 2005
How I got a police escort out to my car last night.
Things you don't want to hear at 10 o'clock at night while you are in charge of a completely full hotel... alone.
Realistic phone sounds: "Ring, ring....ring, ring...."
Me: "Front desk, this is Lauren, how may I help you?"
Guest: "You gotta get somebody up here right now, there's a fucking psychopath outside our door!"
And that's just what I did hear.
Insert back story: We had a DUI program at our hotel yesterday, lots of drunks that were only there because their only other option was jail. They're stuck at our hotel, 3 to a room, no personal calls, class all day, catered food, and no free time with exception to occasional smoke breaks. It's a cakewalk. Generally these programs are pretty good-- the advisors keep a close eye on everyone and occasionally threaten jail time to some of the pushier students. I get free food at lunch or dinner and they get locked into their rooms by 9:30-- it's usually very quiet. Last night was another story. The students were being more annoying than ever, "I need this", "I need that", "this is so hard", etc, etc. And this one guy, Danny, kept calling for his girlfriend-- "can I talk to her?", "when does she get out?", "what room is she in?", "patch my call through.", and on and on. And as policy with these DUI classes, we can't disclose any information nor let them talk to anyone. Well this kinda pissed him off. "Well, get one of those damn advisors to call me back, I'll talk to them. My name's Danny, here's my number". A few hours after talking to him on the phone this shady looking character comes walking in all covered in scars and tattoos—but he was blending right in with all the motorcyclists we had in house for the mid-ohio races. I didn't think much of it. He said hi to some local guy that had stopped in to fill out an application, "hi Danny", "hi Tim", I hear them say, but still, it didn't click. He told me he was going up stairs to visit a friend of his and his friend’s old lady. Again, no click-age. I didn't think anything of it until I heard that woman on the phone quickly whispering "psychopath", and then it all made sense and made me a little shaky.
Continued....
Me: "Uh... okay."
Guest: "No! You don't understand, this guy is crazy, you gotta get someone up here now!"
Me: "Ma'am, just calm down a sec, keep the doors locked and stay quiet, I'll get help."
Guest: "Hurry!"
Phone sounds: "Click.... Ring, ring... ring, ring..."
Me: "Front desk, this is Lauren, how may I help you?"
Guest: "Yeah, this is the guy in 310, and you guys should get your security guy up here, there's some guy next door that's freaking everybody out. He sounds kinda dangerous."
My inner monologue: It's just me. I'm the security guy. Fuck that.
Me: "Thank you Sir. Please lock the dead bolt on your door and stay put."
Phone sounds: "Click."
Insert image of me phoning the sheriffs department.
Me: "Hi, this is Lauren from the Holiday Inn Express and we've got a gentleman up stairs that is threatening guests and making a scene, we need an officer over here right now."
Deputy: "Ma'am, is this a guest at the hotel?"
Me: "No sir, but I believe his name is Danny ------, and I have a supposition that he's recently out of jail. He's the boyfriend, or maybe ex-boyfriend of one of the guests in our DUI program."
After that the deputy informed me that he knew this Danny, everyone did. He had recently gotten out of jail and had a big problem with violence and alcohol. "Make sure to lock your doors if you can, ma'am."
I looked around, yeah, I can lock the side office door, but there’s still a big damn open area over the desk that would be real easy to get across… or shoot through.
Minutes went by and I got call after call from people upstairs saying that they could hear someone yelling and pounding on doors. It's was about 10:10pm. Sheriff’s deputies showed up within two minutes and went upstairs with the 2 DUI program directors and my manager, all of which showed up right as the deputies did. But our Mr. Danny Boy had disappeared. There was lots of searching and poking around, but he was still no where to be seen. 11pm came around a second later and it was time for me to get off work. Also something you don’t want to hear as you’re walking all innocently out to your car at night. “Ma’am, this guy knows your face and probably knows that you’re the one that called us. You might not want to walk out there alone.” And that’s how I got a police escort out to my car yesterday.
Realistic phone sounds: "Ring, ring....ring, ring...."
Me: "Front desk, this is Lauren, how may I help you?"
Guest: "You gotta get somebody up here right now, there's a fucking psychopath outside our door!"
And that's just what I did hear.
Insert back story: We had a DUI program at our hotel yesterday, lots of drunks that were only there because their only other option was jail. They're stuck at our hotel, 3 to a room, no personal calls, class all day, catered food, and no free time with exception to occasional smoke breaks. It's a cakewalk. Generally these programs are pretty good-- the advisors keep a close eye on everyone and occasionally threaten jail time to some of the pushier students. I get free food at lunch or dinner and they get locked into their rooms by 9:30-- it's usually very quiet. Last night was another story. The students were being more annoying than ever, "I need this", "I need that", "this is so hard", etc, etc. And this one guy, Danny, kept calling for his girlfriend-- "can I talk to her?", "when does she get out?", "what room is she in?", "patch my call through.", and on and on. And as policy with these DUI classes, we can't disclose any information nor let them talk to anyone. Well this kinda pissed him off. "Well, get one of those damn advisors to call me back, I'll talk to them. My name's Danny, here's my number". A few hours after talking to him on the phone this shady looking character comes walking in all covered in scars and tattoos—but he was blending right in with all the motorcyclists we had in house for the mid-ohio races. I didn't think much of it. He said hi to some local guy that had stopped in to fill out an application, "hi Danny", "hi Tim", I hear them say, but still, it didn't click. He told me he was going up stairs to visit a friend of his and his friend’s old lady. Again, no click-age. I didn't think anything of it until I heard that woman on the phone quickly whispering "psychopath", and then it all made sense and made me a little shaky.
Continued....
Me: "Uh... okay."
Guest: "No! You don't understand, this guy is crazy, you gotta get someone up here now!"
Me: "Ma'am, just calm down a sec, keep the doors locked and stay quiet, I'll get help."
Guest: "Hurry!"
Phone sounds: "Click.... Ring, ring... ring, ring..."
Me: "Front desk, this is Lauren, how may I help you?"
Guest: "Yeah, this is the guy in 310, and you guys should get your security guy up here, there's some guy next door that's freaking everybody out. He sounds kinda dangerous."
My inner monologue: It's just me. I'm the security guy. Fuck that.
Me: "Thank you Sir. Please lock the dead bolt on your door and stay put."
Phone sounds: "Click."
Insert image of me phoning the sheriffs department.
Me: "Hi, this is Lauren from the Holiday Inn Express and we've got a gentleman up stairs that is threatening guests and making a scene, we need an officer over here right now."
Deputy: "Ma'am, is this a guest at the hotel?"
Me: "No sir, but I believe his name is Danny ------, and I have a supposition that he's recently out of jail. He's the boyfriend, or maybe ex-boyfriend of one of the guests in our DUI program."
After that the deputy informed me that he knew this Danny, everyone did. He had recently gotten out of jail and had a big problem with violence and alcohol. "Make sure to lock your doors if you can, ma'am."
I looked around, yeah, I can lock the side office door, but there’s still a big damn open area over the desk that would be real easy to get across… or shoot through.
Minutes went by and I got call after call from people upstairs saying that they could hear someone yelling and pounding on doors. It's was about 10:10pm. Sheriff’s deputies showed up within two minutes and went upstairs with the 2 DUI program directors and my manager, all of which showed up right as the deputies did. But our Mr. Danny Boy had disappeared. There was lots of searching and poking around, but he was still no where to be seen. 11pm came around a second later and it was time for me to get off work. Also something you don’t want to hear as you’re walking all innocently out to your car at night. “Ma’am, this guy knows your face and probably knows that you’re the one that called us. You might not want to walk out there alone.” And that’s how I got a police escort out to my car yesterday.
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